I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
