dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
