We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
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