I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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