Do vagina's smell?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
