Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
