doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize