look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
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