Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
