Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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