i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you didnt know i had herpes?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
