Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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