dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
