there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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