she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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