you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
