just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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