can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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