I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
