What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
