i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
