turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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