It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
