I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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