She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
