She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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