Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
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