I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Couch. On fire.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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