She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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