He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
How external is "for external use only"?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
