Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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