It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize