Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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