Do you still have your period?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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