so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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