my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
