people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
