Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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