apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Randomize