at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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