therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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