i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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