The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize