Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
