let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
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