the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
