I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
