he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
