In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
