Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
