idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Randomize
